12:30 pm
Fuck you and your blog.
You're damaged and need to hurt other people to make
yourself feel better. You know that the blog is an unhealthy public
expression and cry for attention. This fact is obvious to everyone who reads
it.
2:11 pm
A I must say your blog, fucking hilarious. Thank you for
that.
J Thanks! Have you read the WHOLE thing?! Sometimes it's
sad, too.
A I jumped around a few links, randomly like flipping
through a book. The number 7 was sad, but a few of the journal entries, esp the
coffee guy calling for phone sex was humorous. very well written. Also the
Rocco response was tragic but the honesty and way you captured your thoughts
was beautiful.
J Thanks. Brutal soul sucking honesty is kind of my modus
operandi. I like to tear my heart out before I tuck it back in.
A That is the best way isn't it. I mean life is dull unless
we are putting ourselves in an cyclical nature of hurt and regret. (this
was said with no irony intended)
J I hate when people say they have no regrets. If you don't
have regrets you're not taking enough chances, enough emotional risk. Regrets
are enriching. I have many regrets.
A i'm going to take the quiz by the way.
J Yes! Take the quiz.
A I'm printing out all six pages now. Promise that you will
post it and write some sharp and stinging criticism on it. along with some
social commentary.
A i'm done, didn't do so hot, however i'm retaking it since
some of the answers are yes/will be/ or had been. a sad 234.5.
J “223-247: Brace yourself. I am going to fall in love with
you. At first, you’ll be totally into it, curious, excited by the prospect,
there will be mutual attraction. You’ll find me funny, charming, kind. Then,
you will decide it’s just too much. The flattery, the cookies, my genuine
interest in your happiness and success; I’ll insist on spending time with you,
buy you presents, do your laundry. This will test your independent spirit;
you’ll feel suffocated by the attention. In the end you may have genuine love
in your heart for me but will insist on having zero contact going forward.
Predictable, changeable, like the gulf stream.”
J Are you ready for this?!
A I'm ready as long as you promise to detail the most
intimate moments both positive and negative on the blog. and perhaps on
occasion allow me to offer a form of commentary perhaps a parallel experience.
J Everybody is so sure at the beginning they want to be on
the blog and then it really, really hurts. Some get over it, some don't.
J Bonus: what do you want your name to be?!
J Also, I would welcome blog dialogue. I always offer that as
an option, but nobody takes me up on it.
A Can I have something exotic like Akio...which ironically
means glorious man?
A I've been reading through random entries nothing seems
that bad. if anything most of it is just the guys being idiots.
J Mostly it's critical of myself. I'm very hard on myself in
general.
A but you turn it into a charming and satirical self
deprecating humor very much like great comedians do.
J My heart is open, my head is open, my voice is loud. I
try.
A You succeed.
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